Aug 19 2009
Parnell Shmarnell- Mets Get Smoked
Somebody cue the hook, because Parnell needs to be pulled! In the 2nd inning, the Braves batted around scoring 8 runs on 32 hits, on the young Booby Parnell. I feel like I am having Vu-jade, which is the opposite of deja vu. The Braves have faced Booby Parnell 7 times previously, and they were bound to figure out that the guy only throws one fuckin pitch.
Amazingly, the Mets sent out Parnell for more punishment, and low and behold, he gave up another run. Finally after 3 innings, they pulled the plug.
Nelson Figueroa came in to relieve Parnell, and quickly proved why he is not a starter, should not be a reliever, and ultimately, proved my theory, that he and Oliver Perez, have been snacking on too many of these…
Tim Redding came in to relieve Figueroa, and served up a few meatballs which Adam Laroche and Matt Diaz creamed into the Grand Canyon to give Atlanta a 14-2 lead. This guy is fuckin awesome.
Daniel Murphy had a double and a triple, and Pagan added a double of his own. The Mets had a few hits, but not enough to score more than two runs.
I am going to go out on a limb here and say the Mets lost this one. At this point, I am turning off the game and declaring a winner. Normally, I wouldn’t do such a thing, being the investigative journalist I am, but fuck it. Mets lose 15 or more to 2, and continue to suck…
Do those come in coconut flavor?
They come in all sorts of flavors, the best are the cheese flavored. They are made from fresh fromunda cheese, and toenail shmegma. Deeeeeeelicious!
DONKEYBALLS AND MOOSECOCK!! I thought the mets would at least get the wild card this year, instead they are a bunch of injured lame slubs. Sorry mikey but – Lets go Yankees!!
Don’t be sorry, Pete! YankeesBallers.com has been in the works for weeks, I was just going to wait til the playoffs to unveil it. If you can’t beat em’, join em’, right?