In an exclusive interview recently, Carlos Beltran of the New York Mets, told Rich Coutinho of 1050 ESPN Radio, “I’m doing good,  I come to the ballpark every single day, rehabbing, to try and put myself in the best condition, so when it comes time for me to start playing baseball I can go out there and do what I know I can do.”

Well when the fuck is that going to be shit face?

Beltran went on to say, and I shit you not, that he has been taking batting practice and playing catch while sitting in a fucking chair, in an effort to keep his eye-hand coordination as sharp as possible.

Did he just say he was sitting in a fucking chair?  That can not be good but…

Metsblog.com had this to say…

“of course he has… because he’s awesome…” Matt Cerrone commented, he went on to say…

“…i bet, even in a chair, he’s still better than some players in baseball…”

Wait a fucking second, did he just say awesome? Are you fucking kidding me? Better than who, the best guy in the wheelchair league?  What is he going to roll around in the fucking outfield?

Recently, Beltran had to talk to the Feds with Jose Reyes, because the FBI obviously found out they were both doing juice and wanted them to rat.

This motherfucker Beltran has been juicing for years… here is the previous evidence I posted…

Anyway, next thing you know, Beltran and his fuckin knees deflate and he hasn’t played baseball in two fucking years.

I am deeply concerned that at this point, Beltran is playing baseball while sitting down.  Not a good fucking sign for that rusty knee.

Well these fuckin shit faces are at it again.  The New York Mets signed yet another fucking catcher who sucks dick.

The Mets signed shitty free-agent C Rod Barajas to a one-year, $1 million contract.

Barajas can earn another $1 million in ‘easily-attainable incentives, like get on base twice, and catch for at least one inning. you know… shit like that.

The 34-year-old cock sandwich Barajas hit .226 last season with 19 HR and 71 RBI.  Fucking great.

That means someone is getting the fucking axe.  Watch out Santos.

Well, at least this guy has balls.  Last year, mid game, he went up to some lady in the stands and started eating her out.  By the looks of it, he may not be that good at that either.

In the latest news (last week) from the Mets. They have come to agreements with Mike Jacobs and pitcher Hisanori Takahashi for minor league contracts. They would both make roughly a million bucks each if they are added to the Major League rosters.

I like this move. I personally have absolutely no love for Daniel Murphy. He is a shitty fielder. He is a lefty with minimal power and not much of an on-base prowess. I do not think he would even make the roster on most ball clubs. On the other hand. Mike Jacobs has proven himself in this league as someone who can knock the ball around.

Mike Jacobs started his career as a Met. He hit 11 homers in his first 100 major league at bats. Why in the world would the mets keep a guy like that. Why not trade him for an over-the-hill, injury prone Carlos Delgado. That is exactly what they did.

In his best year with the Marlins. Jacobs hit 32 homers with 93 RBI’s. He never hit for average but can sure knock the ball around. Lets hope this works out for him. I am rooting for Mike Jacobs.

Today it was announced that Darryl Strawberry and Dwight Gooden will be inducted into the Mets Hall of Fame. I am an 80’s child. My favorite glove playing little league was an outfielders glove that was red. It had the signature of Darryl Strawberry inside. On the back of all my little league baseball cards it asked who my favorite player was. It of course read Darryl Strawberry. Little did I know, as a 10 year old playing on the fields of Amity Baseball Little League in Brooklyn, NY. That my favorite player was an outright crack head. GOD, Those were the good old days. I remember the games when “Dwight Was Right At Night”, this is a saying that my dad used when we would watch games at night on TV. Dwight Gooden would dominate opponents with his fastball. Little did I know he was a crack head. Two of my favorite players at the time. I never knew they were both headed for the big house.   One thing I do have to be thankful for. These felons gave me my last taste of championship baseball for a die hard Mets fan.

On a side note. Davey Johnson and Frank Cashen are getting in as well. The Manager and GM team that brought the players together in 86′. With this wild bunch. You have to give a ton of credit to these guys for holding it down.

Forget Stephen Strasburg or Aroldis Chapman, the Mets signed a record breaking $427 million 15 year contract on this kid…

His name is Darrell Sanford.  He is 3 months old, which will make him 15 years and 3 months old, when his contract is up.  We have no idea what position he will be playing because he has yet to walk, or speak for that matter.  Omar Minaya said he is unsure if this kid even will ever develop motor skills,  but said he remains committed to stocking the farm system with young prospects.

Sanford had this to say after the signing and receiving a check for $427 million…

In hope of grabbing a hold of some quality free agents. The mets have lightened the load by letting go a some of the lame ducks in there lineup and bullpen. Tim Redding, Jeremy Reed, Cory Sullivan and Lance Broadway have all been given there walking papers. Good luck to you mooks. It was fun while it lasted. We need some real players now.

Redding had a terrible year pitching in 120 innings with an ERA over 5. I guess that isn’t that bad considering it was Tim Redding. Although they did pay him almost $2.5 Million dollars.

Reed and Sullivan were pretty much just band aids filling in for some of the ailing outfielders that suffered injuries last year.

If it only took a really cool name to be a great pitcher in the Major Leagues. Lance Broadway would be the next Cy Young. Cy Young he is not. If you remember. Lance Broadway was traded in from the White Sox for a good quality catcher in Ramon Castro. This basically mean the Mets got absolutely zero for an everyday player in Ramon Castro. Way to go management. Another win for you guys!

Lets just hope this leads to some credible signings in the off season.

Just when you thought the Mets could not make any shittier moves to help this fucking horrible team we have, the Mets have done it again.

Today they announced the resigning of shitty shortstop Alex Cora, to a 1 year deal with an option for 2011.  This fuckface will get a whopping $2 fucking million, with incentives to earn more.  Horrible fucking move in my opinion.  What’s yours?

To make matters worse, they also signed  C Chris Coste.  This fucking shit sucker Coste, hit .224 in 88 games with the Phillies and Astros last season, during which he played 15 games at first base.  He also wrote a book called “The 33 Year Old Rookie”, which should be renamed to the “The 36 Year Old Shitty Catcher Who Once Played 1st Base So He Was Aquired By the New York Mets to Be Their Power Hitting First Baseman.”

Fucking awesome.

Happy Thanksgiving!  I hope you all enjoyed eating turkey until you bust, drinking whisky til you puke and watching football with a fucking helmet on.   Now to some Mets news!

I know it has been a while since I posted about the Mets, but who wants to talk about the same bullshit rumors every fucking day.  When something actually transpires, I will be the first to let you know, but I am sick of all of the speculation.   It is ridiculous.

Anyway,  according to FoxSports.com, the Mets are close to re-signing RHP Elmer Dessens.  Yes, you read that right, Elmer “Fudd” Dessens.

What an awesome fucking move.

The 39–year-old Dessens had a 36.31 ERA in just 8 relief appearances for the Mets last season, during which left-handed batters hit .793 against him.  He struck out 4 batters and walked 76, while allowing 19 home runs.  Okay, so I am exaggerating a little, but are you fucking kidding me with this bullshit?  Ridiculous.

Can we focus on maybe getting some fucking guys, who could hit, or play the field?  Maybe a starting pitcher who can last more 2/3 of an inning?  I don’t know.  Fuck it, I am not getting my hopes up.

**Spelling Correction-  In the title, I meant to write “Jays” not “Gays”…. actually, no I meant it.**

Well, let the fucking rumor mill begin.  From now until April, I will be bringing you the latest Mets Trade Rumors, from the various news reporters who like to fuck with our heads.  Thanks in advance, you fucking cock sandwiches.

Ken Rosenthal of FoxSports.com believes the Mets, Blue Jays and Cubs are discussing a three-way deal that would send Luis Castillo to  the Cubs who initially spoke to the Mets about wife swapping Bradley for Castillo.

Then the Mets, who are fucking desperate, decided to try to fucking scam the Blue Jays, because Minaya knew they had a new rookie GM, and tried to rope in the Jays and Overbay, for Milton Bradley.

According to major-league sources, Rosenthal writes, “The teams indeed have discussed the framework of such a deal,” however, it is a ‘longshot.’

Well, no shit Sherlock, we are talking about Milton “Fucking Loose Cannon” Bradley.  This motherfucker is a complete fucking fool.

The 32–year-old Overbay hit .265 with a .372 OBP, 16 HR and 35 doubles in 132 games for the Blue Jays in 2009.

No wonder the Mets fucking want him, he sucks as much as Murphy, and costs 10x more.  Good fucking idea Minaya, you fucking fool.

Overbay will earn $7 million in 2010, after which he can be a free agent.

Castillo is due $6 million each of the next two seasons.

And by the way,  are we the most retarded team in the world?  Because, wasn’t Castillo like 8th in the NL in hitting?  This fucking guy was not part of the problem last year.  We have much fucking bigger issues.

In September, Jon Heyman of SI.com said the Mets might try to trade Castillo this winter, ‘and take a look at Orlando Hudson.’